Your manuscript boasts interesting characters, an action-packed plot, and descriptions of fascinating places, and yet the story still feels a bit flat and vanilla. The problem likely is your verb selection.
Verbs are the words in your sentences that that show an action (such as “ran”), occurrence (“develop”), or state of being (“exists”). Every sentence requires a verb, unless you’re writing fragments for rhetorical purposes.
Usually the biggest issue with verbs in a manuscript is that they are passive, meaning they show a state of being rather than being action verbs. For example, instead of writing “forested areas are coming into view” (“are coming” is the verb) instead write “forested areas came into view” (“came” is the verb). It’s a shorter, crisper sentence.
Even getting rid of all the passive verbs may not greatly improve your manuscript. That’s because many active verbs are also weak verbs. These are dull, overused verbs that lack nuance. For example, instead of writing “She turns on the faucet and places the kettle under it” (“turns on” and “places” are the weak verb) write “She draws water for the kettle” (“draws” is the verb). The sentence now flows better simply because a single, less used verb appears.
Some writers wrongly try to hide their weak verbs by sticking adverbs next to them. Adverbs can’t do the heavy lifting that a strong, active verb does, however. For example, instead of writing “‘Oh no, not again,’ he says jokingly” (“jokingly” is the adverb propping up the weak verb “says”) instead write “‘Oh no, not again,’ he jokes” (“jokes” now is the verb). Using the right verb tightens the sentence, and “jokes” is a more specific verb than “says.”
A side issue that can occur with verbs is when authors constantly switch back and forth between past and present tense, sometimes within a paragraph itself. For example, instead of writing “He pulls out a chair and told her to sit” (“pulls” is present tense but “told” is past), instead write “He pulls out a chair and tells her to sit” or “He pulled out a chair and told her to sit” (“pulls/tells” is present tense and “pulled/told” are past tense). Shifting the verb tense disrupts the text’s flow and is a bit disorienting. You want to select one tense and go with it through the entire piece.
Before you take the time to reconstruct a story’s plot or reinvent characters or even spruce up the descriptions of your settings, take a hard look at the verbs you’re using. Odds are, those passive and weak verbs or pesky adverbs are the problem.
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My name is Rob Bignell. I’m an affordable, professional editor who runs Inventing Reality Editing Service, which meets the manuscript needs of writers both new and published. I also offer a variety of self-publishing services. During the past 15 years, I’ve helped more than 400 novelists and nonfiction authors obtain their publishing dreams at reasonable prices. I’m also the author of the Storytelling 101 writing guidebooks, four nonfiction hiking guidebook series, and the literary novel Windmill. Several of my short stories in the literary and science fiction genres also have been published.
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